I'm bored!!! ROARrrr!!! Lesson is driving me to LaLaLand. And I realise I've yet to start on the 30 days challenge thingy. Procrastinating in process.. Haha.
I wanna blog. But I don't know what to talk about. Hur hur hur. Anyway, It's Thursday today!! uh.. like.. duh -__-" Sorry. I'm starting to get crappy again. Start save you from this agony and leave now. Byyyyyyiez~
安静的呐喊
♥10:10 AM
Sunday, January 22, 2012
Spotted the 30 Days Challenge thingy. Ps. It's at the very bottom. Just scroll all the way down.. Yea. Before my MidPod. I'll prolly just die somewhere before I complete the 30 day thingy. I wonder if I'll even remember to do it everyday. Especially when CNY is coming. Hmm.. Forget it bah. I shall start after the CNY break. Hur hur hur. Procrastination. Muuuhahahaa.
Anyway. I shall start on today's post. Actually~ Today's post is not so much on what happened this week but more of.. What happened recently. My week started off with last Sunday's sermon. About L.I.F.E
Following up with the biggest shock of my life at the bus stop. Next was bus ride that the air-con broke down and we were asked to leave the bus just cause of one guy who couldn't wait. Following up next was lunching with Lynette, Elissa & Rachel at Pizza Hut, Jurong Point. Then we went to Ji De Chi for dessert.
Up next was the long week ahead. That wasn't the worst part.. The worst part was that.. It's flooded with presentationS!!! One after another. Haish. But it's over. Thank God ^__^ Of course, Monday to Friday was not only presentations. Had fun too.
Monday.. Can't remember anything special. Other than my mind being flooded with the shock by the bus stop thingy.. And.. AVS presentation. Hmm.. Nothing much. Tuesday.. Nothing much too. Wednesday.. Ended class early. Procrastinated to go HOP. wanted to just go home early and start working on my presentation slides. So to prevent myself from giving in to procrastination, I decided to go SAC to wait for Xuan and at the same time, chiong my PowerPoint slides for Thursday's presentation.
Yea. Of all place.. SAC. Hahas. But at least I know that no matter how hard I find excuses to skip HOP, Xuan will still have more reasons for me to go for HOP. This is prolly just the best method to prevent me from skipping HOP =) Also, it teaches me to rely on God's strength & not my own.
Then here comes Thursday.. Where I've TWO presentation. Two may not seems like it's ALOT. But the preperation time is like.. URGH!! So we did the first presentation, Econs. Did kinda.. well? Prolly. At least I was satisfied with it. Then following up with ECMR presentation. That was the killer of the day. All I could remember were all the negative feedbacks. Couldn't really process things after that. I was almost on the verge of cancelling mentoring session with YiTing. But I knew I mustn't.
So after presentation, I went to Haagen Dazz, Jurong point, to meet YiTing. And yea. I was there early *thumbs up* Decided to meditate on the word of God before she arrives. At the same time, also praying hard that the bad start of the day wouldn't affect my mentoring session with her.
When YiTing came, yea. we started our mentoring session, sharing about life, my past experiences, knowing more about the problems she's facing, praying together and the list goes on. Happen to dig out some of her unhappy memories. I feel cruel digging out people's past. Cause I hate it when people tries to dig out my past. But still.. who don't have a past? Moreover, I'm doing this to know her better & also to help her and guide her out of darkness. However, yea.. I can tell that she's not that ready to share about it YET. I'll continue praying for her, hoping that she'll open up and share the remaining part of the story with me when she's more comfortable.
YiTing, our God is a God that heals. He may take someone who is close to you away from you. But be sure that He has better plans in store for you. Do not be afraid. Do not hide from it. All the more, do not run away from it. Face it bravely cause God created you to be a princess warrior filled with bravery and not timidity. Know that I'm always here for you, so is every Zoe member and God. The world may forsake you, but never will your Heavenly Daddy. If God is for you, who can be against you?
Yeap. We had a funderful time together. Met up with Jeraldine after my mentoring session with YiTing and her day of work. Went home together. Yeah!! Yew Tee Kias! :D
On the way home, we were discussing about what to do for Rachel & Sheryl for their birthday this Saturday. Didn't came up with any conclusion by the time we reached Yew Tee.. Haha. So we decided to go home and think about it and text each other if ever we've thought of any ideas. I decided to get my fringe cut as CNY is round the corner. Guess what. The hair cut was $18!! And i was like.. $18 just to cut my FRINGE?! So I decided to get the aunty to trim my hair too. Haha. That makes my $18 much more worth it ^__^
Reached home.. Kinda late.. Like.. 7 plus? Collapse in bed. Still thinking about the failed presentation in the day. Decided to have a good nap and forget all the unhappiness when I wake up for dinner. So I went zzz in my beloved LaLaLand :)
Woke up, with thousand and one messages. Lol. Read & replied all. Went Facebook, read all notification. Saw a Facebook chat message, shocked to see the person's name. As in.. shock to see that the person PM me. Read through. Threw my phone aside and went to eat. Haha. Not that I'm angry or what. But I guess I was just too tired to think of anything. I was suppose to wake up and leave all the unhappiness behind in LaLaLand~ and when I saw the message, I was like .. Let me have my dinner and store up energy before I face this issue. Haha.
Yea. My mind was only on food. After dinner, whatever that was left unsolved still has to be solved. Went back to "retrieve" my phone. Re-read the message. Felt hilarious, stupid, apologetic, angry & all sort of mixed feelings. In short, I felt lost. Lost in the sense where I didn't know how should I even be feeling.
First thought that came to my mind: I thought we were suppose to cut off all contact. Lol. Second thought: So what sort of reply are you expecting from me? Am I even suppose to reply? Third thought: But I really didn't mean to avoid you and scream at your face when I bump into you at the bus stop on Sunday.
Honestly, I didn't know what was going through my brain at that point of time. That scream was like a auto reaction that I didn't even know I screamed until Rachel, Lynette & Elissa told me about it. I've no idea if I was to share this with anyone but I told Xuan about it. I didn't know what to do with that message. WhatsApp-ed Xuan, got some advice and I'm still thinking about it. Haiz..
Whatever it is, Thursday was like a GG day. But my God is still greater than all my troubles/problems. Oh! I forgot to mention something!! I met Kah Fai while I was on my way home after the hair cut. When you bump into him at Yew Tee, it just means that he was there to visit Melissa. Haha. So I was like, "You two still together?!" haha. Nah. I was just being sarcastic to Kah Fai. He is a good guy and i'm sure he has always been a good boyfriend to Melissa.
At times, I'm really envious of the two of them. Not that Kah Fai is not my boyfriend.. LOL! But it's the chemistry between this couple. Yeap. Wait till I find my Mr. Right. Taahahaaha!!
Okay. My Thursday seems very Roller Coaster. Hur hur hur. As for Friday, Yes!! TGIF! Muuuuuuahahaha!! It's prolly the only day I look forward to every week. Haha. Had lessons in the day. Then went shopping in town with Edwina Poh!! Yea! My bestfriend in poly ^__^
We alighted at Lucky Plaza. Then we walked to Takashimaya. From there, we walked to Wistma Atrium. Then to ION. Found a pair of heels at TopShop. Love it to the max. But hated the price. It's like.. $169!! Haha. So we moved on to another shop. Found another pair of heels. Much cheaper, &89.90 but still.. Kinda expensive and don't have my size. The size they have was a size bigger than my size. So we decided to go walk around first.
Landed up in Pedro. Had my eyes on one pair of heels, tried it on, but it didn't look good on me. So we sat there a while to rest our legs. Haha. Then something caught my attention. The heels next to the one I tried was like.. $34.40. And I was like.. O___O!!! $34.40 heels at Pedro?! And it's the kind of heels I'll love. So I got it, tried it on, and it fits. Pulled out my phone, called my mum and she said "Okay!" Muuuuuhahah!! But have to stick something at the bottom which I don't know what was it. But it's to prevent me from slipping. And that thingy cost $10.90 lol. So actually that pair of heels cost $45.30 but still.. As compared to $169. Hur hur hur. If given a choice, I would have took the $169 heels but.. it's okay. They're all the same. Meant to be worn on my feet ^__^
Then here's Saturday.. Went to DI, had some encounter. Celebrated sheryl and Rachel's birthday. Then.. Yea. Busy day. Yawnz >_<
Hello peeps!! I'm like.. Still awake at this hour. It's 3:35AM!! Can't get to sleep now cause I KO-ed on my bed the moment I got home. So I "nap" for like.. an hour.. and it kept me awake till now.. ROARrrr!!
Anyway, how was your day? Mine was like.. Hmm.. Like that lo. School, lectures, studies, bored. Had mentoring session with Xuan after school though. I guess that was the only thing that kept me alive for today.
One thing I've been reflecting about is.. What God has been speaking to me throughout 2011. From 1st Jan 2011 till 31st Dec 2011, I've always thought God was telling/teaching to place my "Trust" & "Faith" in Him. But as I think back now, I think on top of placing my Trust & Faith in Him, I need to learn how to let go of things that wouldn't matter for eternity, things that does not belong to me, things that I've yet to surrender to God.
Things that do not matter for eternity would be things like.. Money, Facebook, Twitter, Youtube, etc. Shall not mention Blogger since I'm on it now. Lol.
Things that does not belong to me would be like.. Certain relationships? Yea. It cost something when we choose to serve Him.
Things that I've yet to surrender to God.. Probably Bao Bei. Some bits and pieces of my life. Times where I choose to be rebellious and make decisions without seeking Him, hoping at the end of the day that nothing will go wrong.
Letting go every small part of my earthly self costs something out of me. And sometimes, I choose to be stubborn and cling on to these things. Father, guide me as I seek you.
I'm not sure if I'm overly sensitive or what, but there are really times where I felt as though I'm falling back to the days where "God, you're only allowed to invade my Saturdays. The rest of the days are mine". But thank God, I'm sensitive when such things are approaching and I have to constantly remind myself to surrender my all to Him.
Here and there, there are really many incidents where I was on the verge of giving up. Honestly, I don't know what was the power that kept me running. But above all, I know God was with me through it all.
It's so miraculous how I came to know God. How He guided me out of darkness, catching me when I'm falling, chasing me when I'm running away, Loving me when I hated Him. The love of the Father can never be comprehended by just a blogpost or a speech. You've got to experience it yourself. Don't ask how would you know if it's the love of God. Cause when you experience it, you'll know "That's the love of my God".
I remember when I first hear the song "Who Am I", He moved. That's when I realise: My God is a living God who move not only on Saturday Encounters but He move every single moment. Even during my personal time. When I'm just looking for a new song to listen to and stuff. And He moved when I first heard the song "Who Am I"
Who am I? That the Lord of all the earth, Would care to know my name, Would care to feel my hurt.
Who am I? That the bright and morning star, Would choose to light the way, For my ever wondering heart.
Not because of who I am. But because of what you've done. Not because of what I've done. But because of who you are.
I am a flower quickly fading, Here today and gone tomorrow. A wave tossed in the ocean, A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling, Lord you catch me when I'm falling, And you told me who I am. I am yours. I am yours.
Who am I? That the eyes that see my sin Would look on me with love And watch me rise again
Who am I? That the voice that calm the sea, Would call out through the rain, And calm the storm in me.
Not because of who I am. But because what of youve done. Not because of what I've done. But because of who you are.
I am a flower quickly fading, Here today and gone tomorrow. A wave tossed in the ocean, A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling, Lord you catch me when I'm falling, And you told me who I am. I am yours.
For those who have yet to have that Godly encounter, I'll pray for you. I'll pray that you'll really have that desire to want to have that same Godly Encounter I had. Cause He said in His word that He will show up to those who really desires Him.
It was never once because of us. It was because of Him. That cross. Those hands, those feet. That Guy, who choose to hang himself up that tree. Jesus, it was all because of You. Thank you Father.
*Name: Venus Lee Yan 李缘
*Date Of Birth: 20th Feb 1994
*Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=743058322
*E-mail: Venus_lee_yan@hotmail.com
*AKA: Retarded Over Turn Blonde Turtle
-Her Love
*Enjoying God's presence
*Reflecting
*Making song covers
*Making videos
*Looking at the moon
*Studying the meaning behind every song
*Singing
*listening to songs
*My friends
*Pursuing my dreams
*Writing phrases that speaks what I feel about certain matter
*Every talent I'm blessed with
*Listening to people
*Split personality
*Everything God has given me
